Finding Bliss (Bliss #1) Read online

  “I know. I shouldn’t have called this late. I’m on the East Coast, so it’s a bit later for me. I couldn’t sleep until I talked to you, though. When you didn’t call back, I had to give it one last shot.”

  “That’s fine. I just got in not too long ago. You didn’t wake me.”

  For the first time, there was a smile in his voice when he replied. “That’s what I was countin’ on.”

  Again, vague.

  “Grey?” It came out more impatient than I wanted.

  “Yes, yes. I know. I’m stallin’. I’ve never done anythin’ like this before. I’m not comfortable with it. I’ve never had to be the one to tell someone…” He stopped, but I was already sitting ramrod straight.

  He was about to turn scary on me.

  And if that was the case, why did I have such an intense reaction to him?

  It had to be my messed up issues.

  Had. To. Be.

  “I’m sorry. Again, I’m stallin’. I don’t have good news, Clara. I…I think the best way to do this is just to do it – like a Band-Aid. I’ll do this best I can…”

  “Just go on, Grey,” I encouraged him.

  And why am I doing that?

  “Jon died yesterday mornin’.”

  My lungs turned to stone in my chest; I couldn’t breathe.

  “Your brother, he’s dead.”

  “What?” I rasped.

  “Your brother is Jon Vincent, right? God, I should have asked that first.”

  If it were other circumstances, I might have laughed at that. But I couldn’t. “Well…yeah,” I answered in a small voice.

  “I know you two haven’t spoken in a very long time. He told me that you had a fallin’ out. He never explained why or what it was over, and I don’t want to intrude. I won’t ask questions regardin’ that – it’s none of my business. But his funeral is Monday mornin’. I thought you should know and well…I need you to be here for it.”

  Oh, dear God, no!

  “What?!” I wheezed.

  “I’m sorry, Clara. I know this has to be a blow. It is for me. Jon and I… Well, we’ve been close for a long time now, and I just…you need to come. He, at least, needs his family here to show respects. You’re all he has left.”

  My vision tunneled, and my breath still wouldn’t come. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t say a word. I was in shock, denial. “I, ah… I, wha, no…”

  He waited a few moments, knowing I needed time. “Are you there?”

  “No.”

  No, I wasn’t here. I was in a different time – one where Jonathan existed to me.

  “There’s also a couple of issues that need your attention, Clarabelle. His attorney told me that you’re needed at the readin’ of his will. It’s another reason I figured you’d come here. He will be contactin’ you soon regardin’ Jon’s estate and-” He stopped and cleared his voice. “I told him that I was gonna call you first. I figured you’d like to hear it from someone…uh, make it not so professional.” He blew out a breath. “I’m not makin’ sense here… I thought you might wanna hear it from someone close to Jon.”

  My mind raced. Jonathan was dead. Dead?! I didn’t know how to feel about it. It was still hard for me to come to terms with the boy I’d once loved when I was younger, the one that was so sweet and caring, to the man he became. It was a love-hate relationship in my mind and heart. But this… I bent over and placed my head on my knees, turning it so that I could keep the phone to my ear.

  “Clara? Clara, are you there?”

  His voice helped soothe me, and I gulped in breaths. “I’m…I’m here,” I struggled out.

  “I’m so sorry.”

  This man was Jonathan’s friend. I might have liked his voice, but he had an association with Jonathan. Was he a monster…like my brother?

  That caused me to sit up and reign in my emotions.

  “Thank you for calling, Mr. Raiden. I… I, uh…I will not be attending the funeral, and I do not want anything that belonged to my brother. Goodbye.” I hung up and threw the phone on the couch.

  That was probably not the best way to handle that, Clara.

  I told myself to shut up. There was no good way to handle this.

  I needed Galen.

  I hopped up and ran to my cell, immediately dialing him. He was usually a night owl, up working at all hours. He had to be awake.

  His voicemail clicked on after it rang and rang.

  No! Please, Galen, pick up!

  I called again. This time his sleepy voice came through. “Clara? Are you all right? What are you doing calling me at this hour?”

  Galen’s presence, even though it was through the phone, usually calmed me. Not tonight – I was freaking out!

  “Oh, Galen! I just got a call. Jonathan’s dead,” I rushed, barely getting the words out.

  He was silent for a moment. “What happened?”

  “I don’t know!” I screeched.

  His voice was composed, controlled. “Okay, okay. Calm down, girly. It’s okay. Tell me about the call.”

  I gave him a rundown of what Grey told me, ending it with how I needed to be there for the reading of the will. I didn’t think I could do that. I didn’t even know where Jonathan lived; Grey said the East Coast. It had been eleven years since I’d seen or talked to my brother. He’d vanished that night.

  “Oh, sweetheart. I hate to say this, but I think you should go.”

  “What?!”

  He couldn’t be saying this!

  “Listen for a minute. Just listen.” I stayed silent so he could continue. Galen would never steer me wrong. Never. “You’ll be able to see for yourself that he’s really and truly gone. It might help you gain closure. To know that he’s dead… You’ll never have to be scared again.”

  I fell onto the couch as I thought about it. “I don’t know. I don’t think I need closure, Galen.”

  “I think you do. Remember our talk earlier. You still have issues over this.” I attempted to interrupt him, but he talked over me. “You’ve come a long way, and I am so proud of you for that. You’ve overcome things most people do not. This might make it all go away. Maybe you can finally live your life. The past will be buried after this, Clara. Literally. I think it would be wise to see that happen.” He took a deep breath. “As far as his will is concerned, you don’t have to take anything. But as an attorney, your attorney, I think it might be best to see what it says. It could be beneficial for you in the long run.”

  “I don’t need money, Galen. My parents and you made sure of that.” I had healthy trust funds from them. I didn’t have to work. I could live and do whatever I wanted for the rest of my life, not having to worry about money. But that wasn’t something I’d ever want. My purpose was with Galen.

  “I know that, sweet girl. But still, it would be smart.”

  Galen would never give me bad advice.

  Right?

  “Will you go with me?”

  “I think this is something you need to do alone.”

  There goes that hope.

  “I don’t know, Galen. I don’t know.”

  “Sleep on it. Did this man give you a number that I can call, or did he give you the attorney’s contact information? I’ll find out everything I can for you.”

  He was a saint.

  “I have Grey’s number. He had left it earlier, before he called again. I didn’t realize…”

  “Hush, now. I know you didn’t. Give me the number, and I’ll take care of everything. But, Clara, this will be the best thing for you.”

  For the first time, I didn’t believe him.

  Chapter 4

  Clara

  My whole world had been flipped upside-down in the matter of a few short days. It’d passed in a blur, and I couldn’t entirely recall the events that had transpired since Grey’s call Friday night.

  Strangely, it seemed as if my senses snapped back into an acute focus, and all of a sudden, I found myself standing in the bathroom at a hotel in Ashevi
lle, North Carolina. It was Monday morning, and I was dressed for a funeral.

  Did the last few days really happen?

  I vaguely remember Galen explaining his conversation with Grey. Apparently, Jonathan had died in a car accident with his wife. Wife! He was married! Even in my daze, I couldn’t process this fact. What kind of woman was she? How could she stand him? Maybe she didn’t know. Maybe he put on that façade of his. The possibilities were endless.

  There was a conversation with Jonathan’s attorney that I recalled snippets of, but the only thing that stood out was that I needed to be at his office on Tuesday morning. I loathed this. I didn’t care about anything Jonathan had left me. All his assets would be liquidated and donated to a foundation of my choosing. I might as well do something good with the shit handed to me.

  My eyes roamed over myself in the mirror. My hair was pulled back into a severe bun at the base of my neck, hiding all my hair, and my makeup was light, subtle. I was wearing black slacks and a black camisole under a black blazer. It was fitting for this occasion, acting almost like body armor. I looked fearless, poised, and self-confident. I had no recollection of putting this outfit together – it must’ve been Paige’s doing. Still, my outward appearance didn’t match what was going on inside of me.

  I didn’t know if I was strong enough to go through with this.

  My hands were already shaking, and I hadn’t even left for the funeral yet, though it started in a few hours. There was a long drive ahead of me – I knew this – but my feet stayed rooted to the ground. My emotions were in turmoil. I wanted to hop back on the plane and head home. I wanted to curl up in my apartment for the next year and never leave.

  Why are you so scared, Clara?

  In all honesty, I was afraid this was all some hoax to get me here and Jonathan was still alive. I was being irrational – it was my fear of him talking – because no one could put on such an elaborate scheme, even someone as conniving as Jonathan.

  Anger started boiling inside me as I imagined doing this alone. Why would Galen do this? Why wouldn’t he come when he knew I needed him? But then his intentions became clearer, and my anger fizzled away. It wasn’t about punishing me or not wanting to come. Galen knew me and knew my fears. And my biggest fear was Jonathan. It had been since the night he disappeared from my life.

  Come on, Clara. You’ve got this. You can do this. Fear can’t hurt you anymore. Jonathan can’t hurt you anymore.

  It was time to stand up for myself. It was time to make fear my bitch.

  I took a deep breath in and let it out. I repeated the process several times, needing to box up my emotions and turmoil and top it off with a lid. It was for the best in the long run.

  The telephone in my room rang, wrenching a squeal from my throat. I covered my heart and looked at it.

  Oh, the car.

  I picked up the phone and answered, “Hello?” It came out breathy and shaky.

  “Ma’am, this is the front desk speakin’. Your driver is here.”

  “Oh, okay,” I whispered. “I’ll be there in a minute. Thank you.”

  “My pleasure, ma’am.”

  I put the phone back in its cradle and grabbed my bags and purse.

  This was it.

  Why does it feel like I’m heading right for a train wreck?

  ♥♥♥

  A woman was waiting for me when I arrived at the dark SUV. She gave me a wide smile and took my bags from me, chatting away. “Good mornin’, Miss Clara. It’s nice to meet cha’. My name’s Shelley, and I will be takin’ you to Bliss.”

  “Ah, good morning, Shelley,” I replied, trying to keep a cheerful smile plastered on my lips.

  “You look mighty pretty,” she said as she stowed my bags into the back of the SUV.

  “Um…thanks.”

  She opened the back door for me, saying, “The drive’s a good hour, but it’ll go by quick, promise. You’ll see the prettiest views you’ve ever seen. It’s gorgeous country ’round here.”

  Smiling timidly – she seemed nice enough – I climbed in, not responding. She wasn’t offended in the slightest and shut the door for me. We were on the freeway a few short minutes later, Shelley telling me different facts about North Carolina and the Blue Ridge Mountains. As she drove, she went on to tell me about the history of Bliss, the tiny town where Jonathan had lived. She was brimming with information, but I was only listening with half an ear.

  The scenery was what she said it was, so my attention was turned out the window. High mountains were off in the distance, with rolling hills that went in every direction, each one topped off with the most beautiful trees. They were starting to turn the most beautiful hues of fall – red, orange, and yellow mixed with several shades of green. It was majestic, almost otherworldly. It was a huge difference compared to a big city like Chicago, and I found myself starting to relax for the first time in days.

  I thought about what my plans were when I arrived at The Bliss Bed and Breakfast, where I had reservations. Galen had worked it all out for me, thankfully, since I could barely put one foot in front of me the last few days. He gave me a packet with my detailed itinerary. The rental agency would meet me at the B&B so that I’d have a car to get around. Once arriving there, I had just enough time to get unpacked and relax for a minute before heading to the church. Luckily, Galen had already printed out the directions. I would be in Bliss until Thursday morning, when Shelley would pick me up and deliver me back to the airport.

  I wished there was a way to hit fast-forward and skip everything in between.

  The city limits sign came into view, displaying a population of one thousand, three hundred and forty nine. It was smaller than what I was used to, though it made me wonder how Jonathan ended up here.

  What were you doing here, big brother?

  Small homes started passing by at first, and then there was a small gas station that looked like it was in its prime in the fifties. It was still well maintained but had that vintage quality to it.

  “This here is Main Street,” Shelley explained as she made a turn. “Pretty little place, the town. You’ll enjoy your stay. Might be a bit dressed up, though.” She cracked a smile in the rearview mirror.

  I returned it, but mine was forced. “Thanks. I’ve brought a few other things. I’ll be all right.”

  As soon as the words were out of my mouth, the town was there, all around me. The small two lane road was paved with cobblestones. Shops and restaurants were on either side with Halloween decorations displayed in the windows. People were already milling around on the sidewalk, some talking with others. It was cute, quaint, but especially friendly and cheerful.

  I fell in love instantly.

  Seeing this, Shelley went on, “Told you it was gorgeous ’round here. You’re gonna love stayin’ at The Bliss. It’s hard to get a reservation. The B&B’s popular, and they’re usually booked solid six months in advance, especially in the fall.”

  The line of shops ended, and the road transformed into a neighborhood with houses on either side, spaced out on massive lots. Huge trees lined the sidewalks, canopying the street with large limbs still full of leaves. Shelley turned into a driveway, and my breath caught, realizing it was The Bliss Bed and Breakfast. It was a large, three-story Victorian painted in a light cream color, but it had a dark roof that enhanced it, brightening the different tones. A porch wrapped around the house, starting at the front door and continuing around the side of the house. Large seating areas were perfectly placed so that you could enjoy the surrounding lawn and gorgeous neighborhood. It was like a picture out of a fairy-tale. No, a romance novel. It was the kind of place you fell in love in or you brought someone you loved tremendously for a romantic weekend for two.

  Sheesh.

  Paige’s conversation was messing with me.

  What was I thinking?

  First Grey’s voice and now this house!

  Romance novel?

  A place to fall in love in?

  Ha!


  I was losing it.

  Shelley parked and climbed out, opening my door for me. “Really is a beaut,” she murmured with pride, then gave me a wink. “If you think it’s beautiful out here, wait ’til you see what’s inside.” She laughed like it was the funniest joke in the world.

  Weird.

  I shivered a bit at the drop in temperature due to the higher elevation. I eyed Shelley as she grabbed my bags and hefted them out of the back. She was probably forty five years old with dark hair that had a streak of grey above her right temple. Because it was parted and pulled back into a ponytail, the grey strip was accentuated. Her appearance was professional, like me, but it didn’t fit her bubbly personality. I saw her in long flowing skirts or bright colors. She was an interesting character, unlike the drivers I’d come across back home – they barely spoke to you.

  She shut the trunk, and the loud thunk forced me to take my eyes off of her. I didn’t want get caught staring. It would be rude.

  “It’s nice to meet cha’, Miss Clara,” she stated as she moved toward the B&B. “I’m sure I’ll see you ’round town.”

  “Oh, I didn’t realize you were a local.” I guessed it was fitting since she knew so much about the town.

  “Yep, all my life.” She opened the front door and placed my bags down in the entryway. “Good business durin’ tourist season. Like you, they’d rather have a ride up then get lost. It’s easier to drive ’round town.”

  At least I wasn’t the only one.

  I followed her inside and glanced around. She wasn’t lying – the B&B was stunning. The inside matched perfectly with the feel of the outside. Soft colors, muted floral patterns, and dark wood were everywhere. To the right was a sitting room, and to the left was a formal dining room with a huge table that had to seat at least twenty. In front of us was a curved staircase with wood steps and a chunky wooden banister. It was the kind that you’d love to ride down when you were a kid; it had that deep curve to it. There was a long hall to the left of the staircase that led to the back of the house. Everything blended and radiated a welcoming vibe.